Worst Sunday Yet

This is now going to be the part where I start venting and complaining and whining.
Back away while you can.

Against the norm, but quite necessary. I have now reached the rim of my jar and despite the little things I've been trying to do to 'lessen the water', it hasn't completely helped.

I practically work 8-hours shifts every single day of the week. Monday to Thursdays at the hospital (not being paid, its my course requirement), Fridays for tutorials (estimate of 8 hours total), and weekends are at a restaurant as a waitress. The 8-hours are not including the time it takes me to get to and from those places. And when I get home, there's other things to do that I just don't feel like doing (duh), but I have to.

And today, I have reached my limit. I'm extra bitchy, easily ticked off and bothered. It really isn't fun.

Especially when the friends you've always ran to or the partner you had on your side is not there anymore, or is a thousand miles away from where you stand.

I broke a ceramic plate today. Spilled some water on myself. Dropped a lot of cutlery. And got mixed up with orders (as today was my first time to take orders).

Tried to 'recharge' my phone, so as to be able to text my manager my available dates for the week, and despite buying TWICE at two different places, it wouldn't cooperate. I'm guessing they understood me wrong when I asked for a 'recharge'. So stupid me.

Social support is so damn important. And just finding some kind of balance.

And even if i know that, I keep remembering all the things I need to do, and end up just not being able to work straight because I'd get so easily distracted because I'm not completely focused, my mind needing its occasional breaks from work.

This is me whining. Eew. And I know others are experiencing so much worse than I am.

I'm just so tired. And when I get tired, I get extra lonely. And sad. And then, I remember this blog. Its a temporary relief, but at least its something.

What are we without our friends and families? Without the balance of fun and work? Without the drive and passion that drives us every day?

Nothing. Empty. Aimless. And alone.

What do I do?

"Keep on swimming. Keep on swimming. Swimming, swimming..."